THE USURPER LEAGUEPremier League 2013/14.
A different title race.
Everton win our alternative 2013/14 Premier League with 57 points from 26 matches. The usual suspects have been excused.
We removed every fixture involving the clubs on our exclusion list who actually played in the Premier League that year. We kept all other scores unchanged. That's 182 real matches and 14 competing clubs.
The new 2013/14 table
No imaginary fixtures. No points generously handed out. The other clubs keep their results against one another.
| # | Club | P | W | D | L | GF | GA | GD | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Everton | 26 | 17 | 6 | 3 | 47 | 23 | 24 | 57 |
| 2 | Southampton | 26 | 14 | 7 | 5 | 42 | 20 | 22 | 49 |
| 3 | Crystal Palace | 26 | 12 | 5 | 9 | 27 | 26 | 1 | 41 |
| 4 | Swansea City | 26 | 11 | 7 | 8 | 42 | 26 | 16 | 40 |
| 5 | Stoke City | 26 | 10 | 10 | 6 | 33 | 29 | 4 | 40 |
| 6 | Newcastle United | 26 | 12 | 3 | 11 | 36 | 34 | 2 | 39 |
| 7 | West Ham United | 26 | 9 | 6 | 11 | 29 | 26 | 3 | 33 |
| 8 | Hull City | 26 | 9 | 6 | 11 | 31 | 29 | 2 | 33 |
| 9 | Fulham | 26 | 9 | 4 | 13 | 29 | 49 | -20 | 31 |
| 10 | Sunderland | 26 | 7 | 7 | 12 | 25 | 32 | -7 | 28 |
| 11 | Aston Villa | 26 | 7 | 7 | 12 | 27 | 35 | -8 | 28 |
| 12 | Norwich City | 26 | 7 | 7 | 12 | 22 | 31 | -9 | 28 |
| 13 | West Bromwich Albion | 26 | 6 | 9 | 11 | 28 | 35 | -7 | 27 |
| 14 | Cardiff City | 26 | 6 | 8 | 12 | 19 | 42 | -23 | 26 |
How the table changes
With everybody participating, Manchester City lead our all-club calculation. Removing Big Six fixtures puts Everton first in the alternative league.
Who's been excused?
Excluded clubs present in 2013/14: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, Manchester United, Tottenham Hotspur. We removed 198 fixtures, along with every point and goal from those matches.
See the all-club calculated table for comparison
| # | Club | P | W | D | L | GF | GA | GD | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Manchester City | 38 | 27 | 5 | 6 | 102 | 37 | 65 | 86 |
| 2 | Liverpool | 38 | 26 | 6 | 6 | 101 | 50 | 51 | 84 |
| 3 | Chelsea | 38 | 25 | 7 | 6 | 71 | 27 | 44 | 82 |
| 4 | Arsenal | 38 | 24 | 7 | 7 | 68 | 41 | 27 | 79 |
| 5 | Everton | 38 | 21 | 9 | 8 | 61 | 39 | 22 | 72 |
| 6 | Tottenham Hotspur | 38 | 21 | 6 | 11 | 55 | 51 | 4 | 69 |
| 7 | Manchester United | 38 | 19 | 7 | 12 | 64 | 43 | 21 | 64 |
| 8 | Southampton | 38 | 15 | 11 | 12 | 54 | 46 | 8 | 56 |
| 9 | Stoke City | 38 | 13 | 11 | 14 | 45 | 52 | -7 | 50 |
| 10 | Newcastle United | 38 | 15 | 4 | 19 | 43 | 59 | -16 | 49 |
| 11 | Crystal Palace | 38 | 13 | 6 | 19 | 33 | 48 | -15 | 45 |
| 12 | Swansea City | 38 | 11 | 9 | 18 | 54 | 54 | 0 | 42 |
| 13 | West Ham United | 38 | 11 | 7 | 20 | 40 | 51 | -11 | 40 |
| 14 | Sunderland | 38 | 10 | 8 | 20 | 41 | 60 | -19 | 38 |
| 15 | Aston Villa | 38 | 10 | 8 | 20 | 39 | 61 | -22 | 38 |
| 16 | Hull City | 38 | 10 | 7 | 21 | 38 | 53 | -15 | 37 |
| 17 | West Bromwich Albion | 38 | 7 | 15 | 16 | 43 | 59 | -16 | 36 |
| 18 | Norwich City | 38 | 8 | 9 | 21 | 28 | 62 | -34 | 33 |
| 19 | Fulham | 38 | 9 | 5 | 24 | 40 | 85 | -45 | 32 |
| 20 | Cardiff City | 38 | 7 | 9 | 22 | 32 | 74 | -42 | 30 |
About the numbers
This is not an official Premier League table. We use real results to calculate an alternative competition. Wins earn three points; ties are ordered by goal difference and goals scored. This does not attempt every official historical disciplinary deduction or tiebreaker.
Original historical match results: openfootball/football.json, CC0 public-domain licensed. Each source season was validated as a complete home-and-away league before inclusion.
That trophy never existed. The argument about who deserves it absolutely can.